Splinter the stigma: Skylar’s truth

Posted on 16 April, 2019

You took away my worth, my privacy, my energy, my time, my safety, my confidence, my own voice, until today.

There is no way to physically escape. Unlike victims of other crimes, I can never leave the crime scene.

Two years after the incident I’m sitting with my doctor, hands shaking, still trying to arrange a four-word sentence which would change my life. I was sexually assaulted.

It became so easy to remove myself from the past and dissociate myself from threatening situations, I began to experience delusions and round-the-clock paranoia. The word “victim” was thrown into the air and I could feel it suffocating me. I refused to believe I was a victim of crime.

Why? Because ‘victim’ has become associated with a person who is weak, vulnerable and unable to support themselves, while the term, ‘survivor’, has emerged from a rape culture which bolsters victim-blaming and presents a false standard to which those have been assaulted must live up to. It suggests an unnatural response encouraging victims to bury within them a monstrous violation.

The recovery from sexual assault is not focused on seeing brighter days. Recovery involves hard work to regain your confidence, believe in yourself and your identity. The pain of thinking you are a different person because of what someone else has done to you is insufferable and many will stay quiet, searching for a method of healing to bring us solace.

This April, help raise awareness in our community to remove ignorance and the stigma around rape and sexual assault. To raise funds for the Canberra Rape Crisis Centre (CRCC), we are showing the new Avengers: Endgame for the price of $15, only 10 days after it is released in Australia on Sunday 5 May at Hoyts Woden. All funds raised will assist the CRCC continues to educate our community and provide support for all individuals and their loved ones impacted by sexual assault.

I will never fully heal from the assault. For me, it was all about control; over my life, my body and my emotions. The trauma sticks to my nerves, sometimes as a dull ache other times as a sharp pinch when I least expect it.

I am not a ‘survivor’ who has made the best out of a bad card I was dealt. I’m not ready to say this chapter is over because while it may get easier, I work to overcome the aftermath mentally, physically and emotionally every day. I am a victim but I am capable. I am brave. I am a fighter.

the essentials 

What: Fundraising screening of Avengers: Endgame
When: Sunday 5 May at 10 am
Where: Hoyts Woden, inside Westfield Woden, Bradley Street, Phillip
Tickets: $15 per person, with snack combos available
Tickets and more information: TryBooking